One of the biggest concerns for women who are pregnant and looking for work is whether their pregnancy will affect their chances of being hired. It’s a valid worry, because while laws exist to protect against discrimination, not everyone plays by the rules.
This post breaks down what the law actually says, what counts as discrimination, and why you should never feel pressured into hiding your pregnancy during the hiring process. I’ll also share some personal reflections on family interference, which in my own experience has been just as draining as workplace bias.
The Legal Position: Pregnancy Discrimination is Illegal
Under the Equality Act 2010, it is unlawful for an employer to discriminate against you because you are pregnant, are on maternity leave, or plan to take maternity leave.
This means:
- An employer cannot refuse to hire you simply because you’re pregnant.
- They cannot treat you unfairly compared to other candidates.
- They cannot withdraw a job offer after discovering your pregnancy.
If this happens, it is direct discrimination—and it is illegal.
Do You Have to Tell an Employer You’re Pregnant?
No. You are under no legal obligation to disclose your pregnancy during the recruitment process. Many women choose not to say anything until later, especially if they’re worried about unconscious bias.
That said, some employers appreciate openness, particularly if health and safety adjustments might be necessary. The choice is yours, and it should never impact your right to be considered fairly for a role.
Signs of Pregnancy Discrimination During Hiring
Pregnancy discrimination isn’t always obvious. Sometimes it shows up subtly, such as:
- Questions like “Are you planning to have children?”
- Sudden changes in tone after you mention pregnancy.
- A role being “suddenly filled” after disclosure.
All of these may be red flags. Employers are not allowed to base their hiring decision on assumptions about maternity leave, childcare, or your future commitment.
What To Do If You Face Discrimination
If you believe you’ve been discriminated against:
- Keep records – Save emails, job adverts, and notes from interviews.
- Raise the issue – You can approach the employer informally at first.
- Seek advice – ACAS and Citizens Advice offer free support.
- Take legal action – You may be able to bring a claim to an employment tribunal.
Working While Pregnant: The Real Challenges
Employment is only part of the story. Working while pregnant comes with its own set of challenges—health, financial, and sometimes even family-related. Many parents worry about the impact of work on their children. My view is this: children benefit from seeing their parents work hard, and with the right balance, it’s a positive example.
The challenge often isn’t about work itself, but about the outside noise—people who assume they know better about your choices. And in my own case, that outside noise has usually come from family.
A Personal Note on Family Interference
Now, let’s talk about a different kind of interference: family.
If you’re the kind of parent who thinks your child’s partner is secretly trying to get them pregnant in order to control them—without ever having the decency to actually talk to that partner—you might want your head examined.
I’ve experienced this myself. My partner’s father seems to think I want to control her in this way, despite never speaking to me directly about it. On the flip side, my own parents seem to think she’s the one controlling me. So depending on which side of the family you ask, I’m either the manipulator or the manipulated. You couldn’t make it up.
Frankly, for a parent to think this way comes across as paranoid and delusional.
Her parents seem to listen to a one-sided discussion from her, which, frankly, does nothing but reinforce a potentially anxiety-driven, paranoid idea. It doesn’t help them understand the situation—it only inflates their assumptions about me supposedly “controlling” her.
All couples have at least one serious discussion about whether to have a child or not. That’s normal, and I firmly believe my partner and I have had that discussion honestly and openly. What I will not accept, however, is either my partner or her father twisting that into some narrative that I’m using the idea of children to control anyone. To imply that is not only insulting, it cheapens what is, for any couple, one of the most important and heartfelt decisions they’ll ever make.
To be clear: I have absolutely no interest in controlling my partner—never have, never will. Most times when my partner has claimed otherwise to others, those same people have understood that I wasn’t trying to control her at all. In fact, my actions have always been about protecting her and having her best interests at heart. What has been misrepresented is a negative narrative, portraying me as controlling, when the reality is the opposite.
Her father once said he wanted to be friends with me, but being friends actually involves talking to me and treating me with some modicum of respect—neither of which I’ve really heard or felt. My opinion of her father remains the same as it always has been: genuine friendship is unlikely. Frankly, I see him fitting a stereotype many Scots perceive of some English individuals—backstabbing and two-faced. Her father also always struck me as the typical helicopter parent—over-involved, hovering, and quick to assume control over situations that aren’t his business. I’ve always viewed him as a sackless, judgmental potential father-in-law, and he keeps proving it every time he opens his mouth. His behaviour has even inspired other blog posts of mine—like when he assumes I sit on my arse all day doing nothing, showing he doesn’t understand ADHD or autism—or that most of the work running a holistic site is largely administrative, which naturally involves sitting for much of the day.
I need a partner who is genuinely supportive and understanding—not one who acts supportive, then runs to their father over every little thing, claiming I’m controlling. While it would be good for both myself and my partner, I want her to go work because it gives me more time to focus on figuring out what needs to be done in my business now, and later on the social enterprise, independently. In fact, the real detrimental factor is when my partner isn’t working. It means I can’t fully dedicate myself to my business or plan for the social enterprise without worrying about her mental health and well-being. Her going to work allows both of us to function better—she maintains independence, and I can focus on my responsibilities and projects. If her parents can’t have the decency to actually talk to me first, then kindly shut their pie hole or do something useful about it.
And if either my partner or her parents truly believe I’m controlling her in this—or any other—manner, then I’d suggest her parents arrange for her to leave or pick her up themselves. Because sitting on the sidelines and throwing accusations helps no one.
My partner working has absolutely no detrimental effect on me—in fact, it helps me. It means I can focus more on running an actual business and setting up a social enterprise, without the added worry of whether she’s okay.
To be blunt: pregnancy is not a control tactic. It’s a life-changing event that deserves respect and support—not suspicion.
Final Thoughts
Pregnancy should never be a reason for losing a job opportunity, nor should it become a weapon for family drama. The law is clear: employers cannot discriminate against you for being pregnant. The real challenge often comes from misunderstandings closer to home.
If you’re pregnant and job-hunting, know your rights, stand your ground, and don’t let anyone—whether it’s an employer or a parent-in-law—convince you that pregnancy is something to be ashamed of or manipulated with.
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